Gotta Love Oracle
After a March 2025 breach in which usernames and encrypted passwords from Oracle Cloud were published online, Oracle claimed that "the Oracle Cloud -- also known as Oracle Cloud Infrastructure or OCI -- has NOT experienced a security breach." The data, according to Oracle, was from "obsolete servers that were never a part of OCI."
Let's walk through a hypothetical situation. Oracle tells me that they have a high-security bank vault. Great, I say, I'd like you to put my wallet in there. Oracle says "Sure thing!" and takes my wallet. Then I find out that my wallet has been stolen. What the hell, Oracle, I thought you said your vault was secure? "Don't worry, it is!" replies Oracle. "Your wallet wasn't stolen from the vault. Your wallet was stolen from an old coat closet across the hall."
Gotta love Oracle, huh? James Gosling, one of the creators of the Java programming language, worked there briefly after Oracle acquired Sun Microsystems. Discussing his departure, according to EWeek, "Gosling already had the sense that Oracle was 'ethically challenged.'" About Oracle CEO Larry Ellison, Gosling remarked that "He's the kind of person that just gives me the creeps."
Congress Passes Law: Only One Disease
One of the most helpful troubleshooting tips I ever learned came from a very old medical doctor.
Years ago, at the doctor's office, I noticed a framed newspaper page with a headline in large block letters: CONGRESS PASSES LAW: ONLY ONE DISEASE.
I never had time to take a close look at it, but on one of my visits I asked him about it. He laughed a little and then told me that he used to teach medicine. One of the things that he drilled into his students was this: There will be times when a patient comes to you with symptoms that don't match any disease. What you have to remember is, there's no law that says your patient has only one disease. He said it so often that some of his students had a novelty newspaper printed with the fake headline.
There have been many times when I was struggling to find the source of a problem, only to discover that the problem isn't actually one problem. Sometimes one failure will trigger a second and a third. Sometimes two systems seem to fail at the same time, but you'll find that isn't what actually happened: One failure went unnoticed until the second system failed for unrelated reasons.
Look for simple things first, but if you can't find a simple explanation for what you're seeing, be mindful of the possibility that your patient might have more than one disease.
Ah, the Joys of Sponsored Content
It doesn't inspire confidence in a news site when it runs "Sponsored Content" like the image below. Sure, the photo of the Social SecuuririTty ADMiNiSTRATiON building looks real, but the headline implying that Congress did something? No one will believe that. This idiotic ad was appearing on thehill.com as of 4/4/2025.
The online advertising ecosystem is a constant source of joy. We truly live in an age of miracles.
Why Services Become Lousy
Why do so many online platforms become shitty? Cory Doctorow has been writing about the phenomenon for several years. He's written about this tendency in social networks, and the term he used to describe it — enshittification — has become a part of the popular lexicon. His article about Amazon, written in 2022, does an excellent job of explaining why shopping at one of the world's most successful businesses has become a grotesquely awful experience:
How Monopoly Enshittified Amazon
Coincidence, or Cause and Effect?
Many people have been warning about the potential disasters resulting from granting untrained DOGE "geniuses" acess to systems that they don't understand. (We've been warning about this, too.) And as of this morning, we have this:
Coincidence?
Could be. But I wouldn't bet on it.
The DOGE Rush Job
There's a new post in the sparsely-populated Articles section of this site explaining why Elon Musk and DOGE are a disaster waiting to happen. Did I say "waiting to happen?" That's not actually correct. The disaster isn't waiting. It's already underway.
Arguably The Best Essay Ever Written About Programming
For those of us who would like to explain just how bad our information technology infrastructure is, but have never been able to find the words to convey the sheer horror of it all: Someone has already written an eloquent explanation. Print it out on paper so that you'll still have a copy when it all collapses into a smoldering pile of bits and bytes:
If You Can't Say Something Good...
Mindful of the fact that focusing only on life's negatives will take a toll on mind and body, I would like to say something about a good piece of software.
KidPix was a fantastic program. KidPix was written and designed by brilliant people. All glory cannot go to the Hypno-Toad. Some glory must be kept in reserve for the authors of KidPix.
Once Upon a Time I Was Ever So Slightly Funny
I just stumbled across an article I wrote ages ago in which I said this: "Sadly, the word on the street is: the 64-bit versions of Windows will not support 16-bit applications. Sob! Who'd have thunk it?" If you get that joke, you are hereby awarded 100 highly-coveted CloudIsDown bonus points.
The Mythical Man-Month, Summarized
Years ago, I saw a coworker reading Fred Brooks' book The Mythical Man-Month. I asked what she thought of it. She shrugged and said, "It's OK, but it's really not that complicated. Basically, it's just this: One woman can make a baby in nine months, but nine women can't make a baby in one month."
